Laugh Everyday
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Cup of Tea:
One day my mother was out and my dad was in charge of me. I was maybe 2 1/2 years old. I had just recovered from an accident.
Someone had given me a little 'tea set' as a get-well gift. It was one of my favorite toys.
Daddy was in the living room watching the evening news. I brought him a little cup of 'tea'. It was water.
After several cups of tea, Daddy praised me for such yummy tea. Then my Mom came home.
My Dad made her wait in the living room to watch me bring him a cup of tea, because it was 'just the cutest thing!'
My Mom waited, and sure enough, here I come down the hall with a cup of tea for Daddy. She watches him drink it.
Then she says, (as only a mother would know) 'Did it ever occur to you that the only place she can reach to get water is the toilet?'
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Genie With a Hearing Problem
aA man walks into a bar with a paper bag. He sits down and places the bag on the counter.
The bartender walks up. "What's in the bag?"
The man reaches into the bag and pulls out a little man, about one foot high and sets him on the counter.
He reaches back into the bag and pulls out a small piano, setting it on the counter as well.
He reaches into the bag once again and pulls out a tiny piano bench, which he places in front of the piano.
The little man sits down at the piano, and starts playing a beautiful piece by Mozart!
"Where on earth did you get that?" says the bartender.
The man responds by reaching into the paper bag.
This time he pulls out a magic lamp. He hands it to the bartender and says: "Here. Rub it."
So the bartender rubs the lamp, and suddenly there's a gust of smoke and a beautiful genie is standing before him. "I will grant you one wish. Just one wish...each person is only allowed one!"
The bartender gets real excited. Without hesitating he says, "I want a million bucks!"
A few moments later, a duck walks into the bar. It is soon followed by another duck, then another. Pretty soon, the entire bar is filled with ducks - and they keep coming!
The bartender turns to the man and says, "Y'know, I think your genie's a little deaf. I asked for a million bucks, not a million ducks."
"No sh*t !!" says the man, "do you really think I asked for a 12 inch pianist?"
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1. Picture yourself near a stream.
2. Birds are softly chirping in the cool mountain air.
3. No one but you knows your secret place.
4. You are in total seclusion from the hectic world.
5. The soothing sound of a gentle waterfall fills the air with a cascade of serenity.
6. The water is crystal clear.
7. You can easily make out the face of the person you're holding underwater.
8. See? You're smiling already.
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